Welcome to Grumpy Sunshine Country: Landmarks, Weather and Where to Park Your Heart

Grumpy Sunshine Country sits at the point where two weather systems refuse to merge and then, inevitably, do. On the northern border, a permanent drizzle hangs over a man or woman who has not smiled since a regrettable incident with a group project. On the southern border, a person so relentlessly warm that birds are said to follow them to the bus stop. Between them lies the Disputed Corridor, which is usually an office kitchen.

The landmarks are easy to spot. There is the Monument to the Unreturned Greeting, where the sunny one says good morning for the forty-first time and receives a nod that could be interpreted as hostility or as digestion. There is the Thermos of Unexplained Tea, left on a desk without comment. Photograph both, because by chapter twelve they will mean something enormous, and you will want proof that you noticed first.

The landmarks are easy to spot.

Now, the hazards. The most common is Overcorrection, in which the grump softens too quickly and the whole terrain loses its edges. A proper crossing takes time. The sunshine character must be allowed one afternoon of genuine dimness, and the grump must be caught, red-handed, doing something kind and then denying it with total conviction. Anyone who tells you this is a cliché has never watched a person hide a bag of good biscuits in a drawer for someone else.

As for parking your heart, I recommend the lay-by just past the first real laugh. You will know it by the way the grump looks startled, as if the sound had escaped from a drawer they thought was locked. Leave the engine running. Things in this country change fast, and there is a sensual little pulse to the moment when the cold person finally stands too close and neither of them mentions the weather.

Pack a sweater, a decent umbrella and an open mind about people who seem unbearable at first. I have met a few characters who walk this road with admirable stubbornness, and the best place to hear that sort of pull is in a voice, not a paragraph. If you want to hear how a confession lands when it is spoken rather than written, TheFriend has a few worth sitting with, including a quiet one called Between the Stacks.

Meet Ada: open Ada's profile on TheFriend.